Steve was also very patient with his idiot Mama…
We used to have an Akita named Steve (The Kid said on the way home from getting him, that he looked like a Steve. And he did.).
For the first few years we had him, he was all over the house. Up and down the stairs, kitchen, bathroom, laundry room, wherever. Often when we came in the house, we’d hear him racing down the stairs to greet us.
Until one day.
Actually, I’m not quite sure what day, but eventually we noticed that he’d stopped going upstairs. We tried coaxing him, calling him, even luring him up with a few of his favorite treats.
No dice.
Never again did he venture up more than a few steps. Inside our house, his world shrunk to the ground floor.
If Crowley ever saw this, he’d wiggle right out of his skin.
Our current dog, Crowley enjoys some television, but is very choosy. Dogs, horses, and elephants are his must-see TV, and he will come running in when he recognizes the jingles from commercials with his preferred animals, or if we spot one and call out, “Puppy!”.
He loves to watch sports with Petey. But unlike my spouse, Crowley’s a discriminating viewer. He loves football of any stripe. He loves basketball, but only college hoops, not the NBA (don’t ask me how he can tell the two apart. These days, all the players look like middle schoolers to me). Baseball and golf? No love.
When we were first married, we had a chow named Harry. We bought him at a pet store because he had gotten too big for the cages the puppies were kept in, and we knew we wouldn’t have been able to sleep at night if we’d left him in that situation.
I’d like to see you turn your back on this mooshie face.
He was obviously a puppy mill pooch, and we think maybe his mother drank heavily when she was pregnant. He was an odd, odd boy. When we brought him home, he hid under the bed for the first three days. He never warmed up to any humans except Petey, my best friend Bo, me, and later The Kid.
But in what had to be the strangest doggy quirk ever, he was terrified of ice cream. Why? It’s not like he was lactose-intolerant, he and Petey could go through an entire brick of Velveeta in one sitting. So why?
And Steve and Crowley’s eccentricities…why?
Dogs do bizarre, unfathomable stuff we will never understand. We just won’t. The knowing is a canine Rubicon that can never be crossed.
On the flip side, there are things that humans do that are utter head-scratchers to our poochy pals. And, that’s my point this week. 
What follows are the top 10 burning questions that curious pups have for us homo sapiens:
1.) Are you hungry? Because I could eat.
2.) I once saw a cat in this yard. Do you think it’s back today? (Asked every single day)
3.) When you go to work today, will you be gone forever? Because you were gone forever yesterday, and I don’t like that.
4.) Who is that puppy in the mirror? Do you know him?
5.) I’m going to the kitchen to root around in the trash. You want something?
6.) Why do you get that loud monster out of the closet, put its tail into the wall and walk it around the room? It scares me.
7.) Do you want to go OUTSIDE! OUTSIDE! OUTSIDE!?
8.) Hey, I just found this stinking pile of something. You wanna roll in it when I’m done? 
9.) Don’t even try to deny it. You’ve been spending time with another dog. Who is it? Is it that puppy in the mirror?
And finally:
10.) You gonna finish that?
Thanks for your time.
In the fall of 2013, the Matthews Family Band was shaken to our core. Petey was desperately ill. From mid-October to the end of March 2014, he was in the hospital much more than he was home.
Our dog, Riker, was my only, my constant companion. Before I left the house, I took him out. After patiently waiting for me all day, we’d go for a walk as soon as I came in at night.
Drinking was an option, but I save my calories for desserts and macaroni & cheese. Riker might have turned to drink, but 200-pound dogs can be really ugly drunks.
Our street is a dead-end, and beyond is forest. Instead of walking our usual route which was to the end of the road and back, when we got to our turnaround, for the first time ever, we kept going.
One day I was walking an unfamiliar path and saw a large German Shepherd coming toward me.
I’m a sucker for a puppy (and all dogs are puppies—always, no matter their age or size).
It’s not just a good idea, it’s vital to do some research on dogs in general, and specifically, the breed in which you’re interested. My family had no idea that in addition to being more energetic than a bus full of sugared-up cheerleaders, they’re hounds, which means they’re loud. Really loud. Like, bloodhound loud.
Honest, she showed up, dripping in malodorous “mud”, hair completely ruined, and thermonuclear danger in her eye.
Fluffy was the one that taught me that a dog can be your very best friend, full of constant, unconditional love. The two of us used to sit on the curb in front of our house and share Charm’s lollipops. We’d take turns, lick for lick.
Back in the Cretaceous period, Dad was running the Coast Guard metalsmith school (known as A.M. school) in Elizabeth City; he was known as “Boss Ross”. I was working at a clothing store in town.
“If you guys aren’t nice, I’m telling my dad.”
His big heart doesn’t stop at quadrupeds. When I turned 16 and got my driver’s license, he and Mom bought me a 1971 Dodge Dart Swinger for the princely sum of $500. My car, which I named Lancelot, had an AM radio which picked up most stations within a ten block radius but not much else. I yearned for a fancy AM/FM car stereo with a cassette deck.
Most people with a somewhat public position would be embarrassed to scoop frozen treats and peddle Fudgie the Whale. I’m ashamed to admit this, but I would be. But my father has never seen any shame or reason for embarrassment in honest labor. He simply can’t fathom that kind of attitude.
As I said though, Dad’s not perfect.
Happy Father’s Day, and to all a good night.
But Libby is dangerously allergic to peanuts. Eggs and dairy are issues as well.
In 0.77 seconds I found 1.12 million results for “name of George Clooney’s pet pig”. It’s Max by the way; and he’s been at the great barnyard in the sky for 11 years! But good luck finding recipes for non-allergenic dog treats.
I took them over for Luna and her girl. And when I left, Libby was standing in a pile of dog biscuit crumbs, alternating between feeding them to her buddy and to herself.
Petey looks like he’s been washing his hands with that new product sold at only the most exclusive retailers, ‘Broken Glass’. He’s got more nicks and cuts than a near-sighted barber student.
Practically a lap dog.
The Kid has a rescue dog; a beautiful little husky (we think). Her name is Bella, and she has eyes the color of a Luna moth’s wing.
bull city mom 