I watch an awful lot of Food Network. If I didn’t write about food, and could call it professional research, someone would probably stage an intervention.
I really enjoy the competition shows.
Chef Madison, and below, Chef Lance. The two greatest Chopped competitors in the show’s history. If you ever have the opportunity to watch the episode, It will be one of the best hours of your life, I promise.
I try not to miss Chopped. Four chefs get a basket of four mystery ingredients in each round. In the first they make an appetizer, then the least successful dish and its chef are eliminated. The second round is main course, after which another elimination. Finally, two chefs prepare dessert, and the best group of three dishes and their chef wins.
The Magnificant Melissa.
The Next Food Network Star isn’t quite what it used to be, but I’ll always be grateful for Melissa D’Arabian’s year; the woman is a culinary genius. Every recipe she makes looks great, and we’ve never made one of hers that wasn’t a winner (So was Melissa. She won the season.).
They also have seasonal baking contests, multi-week elimination mini-series for Spring, Halloween, Winter holiday, and possibly arbor day, they start to blur together.
On one year’s Thanksgiving/Christmas/Chanukah super bowl, there was a competitor named Jason from Kentucky. He has a large personality. He’s also very country. His accent is extreme, and he’s full of folksy sayings about his “mama” and various critters, with a whole lot of “Lord Honey’s” thrown in for good measure. I felt it all seemed a tad studied and a little exaggerated for the non-Southern viewers.
Jason Smith Hanging with fellow Food Network Celebs.
At his more over the top, dramatic pronouncements and pronunciations I would sometimes emit a few “pronouncements” of my own.
But you’ve got to give the man his due. That guy could cook. He had knowledge, skill, and imagination. He could give a little twist to a classic French pastry and make it new for the judges. He also made almost perfect versions of Southern, down-home desserts like pecan tassies, coconut cake, and chess pie.
He was in the final round and they had to make a big showy cake. He made a clever Santa’s workshop with elf silhouettes in the windows set in a snow-blown winter scene. One of the decorations were piles of fluffy frosting piped to look like snow drifts.
He made it with the second of my favorite non-spongy marshmallow foods: marshmallow frosting. He called it by its alternative nomenclature; seven-minute frosting. This stuff is not only pretty and compulsively delicious, it’s less sweet than normal frosting and fat-free.
Chef Jason and his prize-winning cake.
It won him the contest.
Marshmallow Frosting
4 large egg whites
1 cup granulated sugar
Big pinch of cream of tartar
¼ teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon vanilla
Put mixing bowl over slowly simmering pot of water—double boiler style. Whisk together eggs and sugar until sugar’s dissolved, and it’s warm to the touch.
Put on mixer with whisk attachment and beat until it’s glossy and holds a stiff peak (5-7 minutes). Mix in salt and vanilla. Immediately frost cooled cupcakes. Piping the icing makes it go much quicker, and they’re especially pretty that way.
It doesn’t set up and form a protective skin like buttercream. If you’re traveling with the frosted item, either take extreme care, or use a kitchen torch or the broiler to toast and set it.
It was a huge hit with the judges, Duff Goldman, Lorraine Pascale and Nancy Fuller. Duff Goldman, a trained chef and owner of the fabulously successful Charm City Cakes said he had never had seven-minute frosting before but was a true convert.
Duff being a marshmallow frosting neophyte is odd, to say the least. The recipe I use is based on Martha Stewart, who may be a lot of things but she sho ’nuff ain’t no Southern girl.
Martha, Snoop, and their homemade “brownies”.
Thanks for your time.
A few weeks ago I went to a dinner and met Erin Rolandelli.
In college, the students had to be placed in a classroom to observe and learn from seasoned vets. She was given an ESL (English as a second language) class.
“It was gritty. It was what I expected it to be, and not what I expected it to be, all at the same time.”
Erin wanted to keep her kids engaged and learning. She was informed budget cuts in the coming year made any improvements impossible.
One of the things they discovered to be a need and if fulfilled, a game changer for children was mentoring. An adult that children can rely on to have their backs, be a support, but also have expectations for them and hold them accountable.
Right now, One Compassion is working to make sure every family in the county has a Christmas. That parents have the joy of providing for their children. What that may look like is individual to each family. To determine needs, Erin works with them, her team, and their resources. It could be funds for groceries, help with gifts, or even a repair to a broken window so the children can be nestled all snug in warm beds.
Thanks for your time, and have a wonderful holiday season and a joyous and peaceful new year.
It’s much maligned, but sugar can be deceptively beneficial.
Sugar sprinkled over wounds kills infectious microbes and speeds healing.
And sugar, almost all by itself can make lots of dreamy dishes.
Hard candy, or what the Brits call “boiled sweets” are just cooked sugar with a little color and flavor. Taffy is cooked sugar pulled, stretched and aerated. Cotton candy is sugar, melted and spun into gossamer strands.
The first way is through the divine meringue. Not the topping for lemon pie, although they both begin life the same way; egg whites beaten into foam with sugar slowly added. For the candy meringues, you pipe out individual portions and then bake them so low and slowly they dry out and pick up no browning. Think of them as giant, irresistible Lucky Charm marshmallows.
The recipe is easy. But preparation is more often than not, a heartbreaker. If it’s humid, they’ll never completely dry out. If they’re not all consistent sizes, some may brown, while others may stay soft in the middle. They literally attract and retain moisture from the air, so must be stored with extreme care.
One paltry dollar. And the place is so full of other scratch-made delights you’ll find loads of other treats on which to spend the rest of your dollars—so be careful.
I’m always a little skeptical about those sweeping “metaphor for life” pronouncements.
Thanks for your time.
Thanks for your time.
When I was little I had a bit of an overbite.
As soon as my last baby tooth was replaced by the adult version an orthodontist outfitted me with enough metal wires and bands to build a suspension bridge over the Atlantic.
Fittingly (or alarmingly, depending on which side of the blue paper bib you fall), my tormenter grew up to become a dentist.
Mobile’s weather is tropical and outdoor activities occur all year long. One December evening, my parents planned to take my big brother Homer, me, and our eighteen-month-old brother to a Christmas carnival.
Homer opened the front door to go out and immediately spun around and yelled, “Somebody’s siphoning gas out of the Opel!”
We stepped out of the front door and saw two figures running away. We ran to the car, Dad jumped into the driver’s seat, Homer jumped in next to him, and put me on his lap.
By the time we got to the end of the driveway, it was clear that our hunt was over.
To release me, they popped my face out of the car like a champagne cork, and we headed back inside.
Thanks for your time.
I should maybe feel delighted that at my advanced age, I’m still discovering things about myself.
It concerns marshmallows. 
But, I’m a fiend for rice crispy treats. Those Lucky Charms marshmallows make my heart skip a beat. I even enjoy toasted marshmallow Jelly Bellies.
Turn on mixer. Using whisk attachment, turn on low speed and, while running, slowly pour sugar syrup down side of the bowl into gelatin mixture. Once you’ve added all the syrup, increase speed to high. Continue to whip until mixture becomes very thick and is lukewarm, approximately 10 to 13 minutes. Add the vanilla bean caviar during last minute of whipping. While mixture’s whipping prepare pan:
Put confectioners’ sugar into small bowl. Lightly spray 13 by 9-inch metal baking pan with cooking spray. Cover with a piece of oiled foil. Add sugar and swirl to coat bottom and sides. Save remaining sugar for later.
Once candy’s set, place a piece of parchment onto large cutting board. Turn marshmallows out and peel off foil. Dust bottom and sides with more powdered sugar. Using powdered sugar dusted pizza cutter, cut 8 pieces wide and 4 long. As you cut, place into zip-top bag with powdered sugar in it. Gently shake to coat. Place onto parchment to fully set.
What I discovered about marshmallows is I love the flavor. It’s the texture that weirds me out. That spongy, bounce-back, “it’s alive and will devour you” feeling—I can’t even. I do not like food that feels like it’s fighting back.
Thanks for your time.
About twenty Christmas’ ago I was working in a Waldenbooks at the mall. A grandmother, her children, and her approximately ten-year-old grandchild came in told me they were looking for a book as a gift to a family friend.
With a keening howl that sounded like it was violently flayed from her very soul, she responded, “But I haaaate booooks!”
In retrospect it was one of the saddest moments I’ve ever experienced. In this child’s entire life, no one, not family member nor teacher had helped her discover how magical books could be.
I believe that not exposing a child to books and encouraging them to read is a form of child abuse. It will handicap them for life.
And, if children’s literature is terra incognita for you, I have some reading level-based suggestions.
The Sesame Street Dictionary by Linda Heyward. This is a terrific tool for learning to read. All the words are charmingly illustrated. Kids will spend hours teaching themselves to read by accident.
It’s crazy old school, but the Bobbsey Twins, by Laura Lee Hope.
Experienced Child readers: The Great Brain series by John D. Fitzgerald: From the point of view of his little brother, the Brain’s an adolescent confidence man living in the late 1880’s.
The Betsy series, by Maud Hart Lovelace span all reading levels. They start with Betsy as a very young girl told in a simple picture book, and progress in age and level until Betsy is a married woman. She’s one of my most treasured childhood friends.
A childhood deprived of books is a tragedy. To help instill the love of the printed word is a huge, heroic act that will forever change a child’s life.
To become a hero, Hercules had to kill a bunch of stuff, clean the stables of 1000 cows, and steal fashion accessories from an Amazonian princess.
Thanks for your time.
I highly recommend giving this recipe a go. I’ve never met a fellow human who did not love these cookies like hairspray at a beauty pageant. 
Just press pause.
Is there someone on your list who’s tough to buy for? So, don’t. If you know them well enough to give them something, you know something they’ll like.
Maybe it’s a secret Santa gift, or you want to give something to someone who surprised you with a gift. A treat from the kitchen, or something useful that you’ve made is nonspecific yet personal.
So, Gentle Reader, you’ve decided to take the plunge and rock a homemade holiday. The inevitable next question—make what?
Kitchen gifts: Everybody loves a food gift. Not sure? Think about the last time somebody brought some unexpected grub to your place of work. Grown responsible adults turn into gleeful children at the appearance of a box or tray of goodies.
Do something crafty: Do you knit or crochet? Are you a woodworker? Sculpt barnyard animals out of chewing gum you find under bus seats? Make it!
Thanks for your time.
bull city mom 