My version of AAA is of absolutely no help if, as my mother warns, “You’re out late at night, in the middle of nowhere and your car breaks down.”
But, I don’t think I’ve ever been out, late at night, in the middle of nowhere. Because isn’t everywhere somewhere?
My AAA is three of my very favorite vegetables (in alphabetical order):
Artichoke. I never ate an artichoke until I was in my twenties, at a business dinner. The wife of the owner ordered one, and gave me a tutorial, and a taste—I loved it at first bite.
The artichoke is a member of the thistle family and has been cultivated and eaten since the time of Homer. It has some of the highest levels of antioxidants of any vegetable. It’s high in fiber, vitamin C, folates, and iron.
Italy is the largest producer, and consumer in the world. They also have tons of recipes for them. But my favorite way to eat them is the first way I had them, and the most classic, simple prep. I cut off the sharp tips of the leaves, trim the stem, and steam them for 30-40 minutes, or until tender.
After it cools I serve each on a platter with a spoon and a small bowl of mayonnaise. Working from the outside, peel off a leaf, dip in mayo, and scrape the tender meat off with your bottom teeth. Larger areas of the leaves become edible as you go.
You will eventually uncover the heart. Using the spoon, scrape off all the inedible hairs, until it is clean. This is the best part. Dip it into mayo and enjoy.
The second veg is asparagus, another food chock-full of vitamins, minerals, and fiber.
The heart-breaking thing is that the thinking of many people, even food professionals is utterly backward. Just like Rubens’ models and bank accounts, with asparagus, bigger is much better.
An asparagus farmer once confided to me that he’s thrilled that the trend is for pencil-thin, or “baby” asparagus. Because it gives the inferior product a market. They taste like grass and almost impossible to prepare without over-cooking. The desirable stalks are the ones as thick as your thumb. 
There are undeniably, people out there who don’t like asparagus. But there’s a chance they’ve only had the tiny straw-like version. They deserve to know what good asparagus tastes like. So serve them in the most simple, basic way.
Rinse, then trim the veg by bending each, and letting it show you where to break the end off. Steam them for 5-7 minutes until they’re still more crisp than tender. Drizzle melted butter over and salt generously. Serve immediately.
I first encountered my last favorite veg as a child in Puerto Rico where avocado trees are ubiquitous. The matriarch of life-long family friends the Murphy clan, Momma Cat was about to tuck into one. I asked for a bite, and she gave me one, but warned, “they’re an acquired taste.”
It was the most disgusting thing I’d ever put in my mouth. It was like a mean-spirited practical joke. Why, I wondered would anybody eat avocados on purpose?
But wise Momma Cat was right, and I eventually acquired a taste, and then a love for this unlovely platypus of the vegetable world.
Guacamole is wonderful, and I eat it every chance I get. But I just adore avocados simply peeled, sliced, and salted, or what I call Momma Cat-style.
So, my AAA will not change your tire, or give you a tow in the middle of nowhere. But as far as I’m concerned, they’re some of the best eating, anywhere.
Thanks for your time.
This space has evolved into my confessional. The embarrassing, the disgraceful, the hurt-y; if there’s a red face and burning ears involved, I’m there and have probably recounted it for you, Gentle Reader.
These days it takes a lot more to set the blush scale into motion. I’ve come to terms with my lack of both grace and tact. But there’s still one category where I’m a tad insecure.
I used to really enjoy sauerkraut mixed with grocery store onion dip. I 
I’d drain them, toss into a saucepan with a too-large dollop of margarine. Then I’d drop in a couple slices of American cheese food, and cook until it was a gloppy, homogenous mass.
I decided to use my go-to veg preparation.
Par-cooked veg
Bring the saucepan to a rolling boil. Slide vegetables into water and cook until the colors are bright, and you can just smell them (4-7 minutes-ish).
When you’re ready to finish them, put them in a skillet (don’t overcrowd). Then you need a couple more items.
Put everything into the pan along with a pinch of salt and pepper, then cover. Cook on medium-low until the veg is tender-crisp. Remove cover and let cook until the liquid’s gone. For a tender vegetable, like peas, remove from heat as soon as liquid’s gone. For harder veg, let them cook until they pick up some browning.
This is a very versatile method which gives you plenty of ways to customize. The biggest thing is to not overcook them. If you went to all the trouble of getting fresh, keep it fresh.
Thanks for your time.
In everything I’ve ever cooked, baked, or even merely applied heat, I have burned almost nothing. And it’s not because I am some miraculous cooking genius, ‘cause trust me, that I am not.
In the kitchen this manifests itself in two main ways.
If she was a wedding planner or caterer, her head would regularly explode and she would likely take up strong drink.
First scrape a little up and decide whether it’s burned or not. Don’t go just by color—give it a smell and a taste. If it’s not burned and just stuck, turn the burner down low and wait a couple minutes. It will then be easy to scrape up and stir in. Then, for the rest of the cooking time, turn it down a smidge, and stir it more often, making sure to keep the bottom unstuck.
I roast them in the oven. It works for almost all types of veg. I clean and trim them then dump them in a large zip top bag. For two servings, I pour in about 1/3 cup of dressing. And not only salad dressing, but you can use that; the other day I used Barnes Supply sweet onion dressing on some French beans. I’ve also used brown butter on broccoli. We really liked honey mustard and canola oil whisked together, with some thinly sliced shallots.
For vegetables that cook quicker I put them on the top rack and use the low broiler setting. They take about 10-12 minutes.
Thanks for your time.
bull city mom 